Contemplations…

So the final point on the Joy series from my pastor last week has to do with Pride and self-centeredness. There is an over-abundance of scripture that cautions and guards us against pride. Pride is the final “Joy Robber.”

I think that the greatest commandment of “love others as yourself” puts into perspective that if we really understood how much we love ourselves, and gave that away… what a difference it would make in how we live our lives.

I always get cautious about talking in accusation of someone else’s faults for fear of the principle that when you point, 3 fingers point back at you.

I would like to think that I am a good listener. I would like to think that I am fairly humble. I would love to think that I am not self-absorbed. As I look at my life and evaluate how I spend my time and make decisions, I realize I have the ability to be selfish. I tend to take my own needs and wants as priority over others. I have tried to become sensitive to this and live with others perspective in mind.

My caution is that I seem to live in extremes… and, I have the tendency to live all one way or the other. I seem to give too much, or not at all… striking this balance of caring for others as much as I love myself is an issue of balance.

If my love is a finite measurable amount, let’s say it is sand in an hourglass… I need to get as much in one side that is the love I am giving as in the side of which I love myself. I don’t know that I am explaining this clearly… in my mind it makes sense…

I guess I would challenge myself to look at a few things; how do I choose how to spend my time? how do I decide whether or not to be involved in something if offered? in conversations, how often do I tell stories about “me, my, I”?

Tags: Pride, Selfish, Joy, Love, Balance

So, I was out having dinner by myself the other night. I was waiting on some friends who were at a birthday party. I was watching baseball on tv. I am not a fan of baseball. I don’t dislike it, it just isn’t my thing. Lately, I have been watching more of it, just because I know that sooner than later, they will start talking about important things like college football, pro football, and then of course, the only thing that matters….. HOCKEY!!!!

They kept breaking in with live updates when Barry Bonds would come up to bat. He is chasing the home run record. There is all of this controversy surrounding it, and I couldn’t really care less about that. I am pretty much over hearing about it.

I was watching him as he approached the plate… He at one at bat looked at the umpire and made some joke and smiled, and I thought to myself… I could not possibly handle that kind of pressure.

I deal with stuff all week long that is not even close to being as much pressure as what he must be under and I get all stressed out. I just can’t imagine how you live in the moment, clear your head and try to make contact with a white ball, let alone hit it out of the park.

So, despite all the controversy and all of the hype of history being made… I want to say, I respect Barry Bonds’ determination and ability to handle the stress. I admire that aspect of who he is…

Just a thought…

Tags: Barry Bonds, Controversy, Focus, Concentration, Respect, Home Run, Stress

it is interesting what perspective we gain when we live without… i guess it is the value of the discipline of fasting…
i am writing today on my phone, my computer is in the shop. thankfully, my wonderful phone picks up on wifi and i can get my important info, and now realizing i can stay in touch with you…
a week ago i took my pastors challenge to go a week without tv… now i am into a computer fast… it is amazing how much time i am consumed by my computer and the internet…
i am learning a lot about my life from living without

sorry for the poor grammar, but my keypad is ridiculously small

I was having a conversation with a friend the other night. We were talking about when we were younger and involved in youth groups. One of the big buzz words in my time was living “counter-culture.” At the time it seemed like a cheesy Christian concept. It seemed like an “initiative” of the church or the curriculum team.

As I have grown up and matured, I have realized the depth of what this concept really means. It is really a struggle to live within a culture and not find yourself adopting the morals and the characteristics of the culture.

It is like when people talk about living in the south. (which I do) People will talk about the pace of life being slower, people tend to be nicer. It is hard to not allow this to enter your spirit and how you live your life day to day.

It is hard to live in our culture here in America and not think that the standards which we are told are correct. The concept of the “American Dream,” which seems to be a fluid concept in and of itself. The idea that we are measured by our successes and our successes are defined by status symbols; boats, houses, cars, electronic gear.

To live our life and really appreciate the journey and not be so focused on the destination is a completely “counter-culture” concept. If we were to live appreciating the process of getting where we are, I think we would all be a bit happier.

I had a friend share with me the other day that we might get judged quickly on our apparent success that is defined by our culture, but the people that matter are going to look at how you worked and acted in pursuit of the success. At that point, success or failure doesn’t matter in a task, as much as your attitude and tenacity in performing the task.

1 Corinthians 9:19

“Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone. I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people…”

What a truly liberating concept… What if I was able to live my life and feel “free of the demands and expectations of everyone”? There is a danger with this freedom to be lazy and to be content with a sub-par life. But, it takes on being free from the demands and expectation to be willing to voluntarily go after whatever it is you want to go after with the greatest tenacity.

If we allow our perspective to be that we are doing what we do well because we are called to be excellent as opposed to being measured up against the proverbial Joneses, how much more rewarding and free-ing is that perspective?

For fear of beating this concept to a bloody pulp, I think that it is simple and clear. I look forward to living my life “free” today.

Tags: Free, Liberating, Expectations, Perspective, God, Christian, Life, Serving

My pastor did a message on having a “Joy State of Mind.” I got a ton out of it… and was feverishly making notes during church. He talked about different points and talked about things that he labeled “joy robbers.”

The first one is: FEAR

It is weird to think about the things of which we truly fear. I made a list of things that I am thinking about too much… some of my list is: failure, finances, looking uncool, losing popularity… Some of them are petty, some of them are pretty severe.

Joshua 1:9

“Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

My friends and I have been joking around about wherever we are, that is the V.I.P. section. So if you see us out on a patio, the patio is V.I.P.

But this concept of “wherever I go” is pretty amazing.

I was out on Friday night at a concert in an overcrowded club. I was standing with my very good friends, in the V.I.P. section. (for those who are following along) There was a guy who was wearing down my very last nerve. I am a guy with a long fuse. It takes a lot to really get me riled up and angry. This guy had done it. I was just about to the end of what I was willing to put up with, and had literally thought through how things were about to go down.

I am not a fighter. I am not strong. This guy who was upsetting me was built like he was both of those. I was standing with two of my closest friends who I knew would have my back in any situation. I thought to myself…”this is going to hurt… I am probably going to got myself knocked out, but my boys are going to give him the worst of it” so in my mind it was just about to go down, I was just about to tap my friends and let them know it was on… and then the situation resolved itself naturally… thank God…

What is interesting to me about that situation is that I am not a fighter. I have been in maybe two or three fights that I remember and the last one was probably in 5th grade, and thankfully I took down a stronger kid. He slipped on some ice, and I ended up on top of him… and allowed him to beg out… a win by 5th grade playground rules.

Back to the jerk at the club… not being a fighter, I should by all means have been really scared of how this was going to go down. But, I was not afraid at all. My friends being with me made me confident, potentially over confident, and I am thankful that it resolved itself naturally.

I realize that I might get hurt in life, but I need not be afraid.

Tags: Fear, Fight, Club, God, Anger, Hurt, Life, Strong

My last post was about focusing on what you bring to church as opposed to figuring out what it is that your church is doing for you. So this might seem awkward timing to talk about how amazing my new pastor has been. It is a balance. You want to be somewhere you can contribute and be a part of the community. You should also be enriched by the community.

I realize how truly blessed I am to be in this situation. I am at a great community. Our pastor has been doing a series on attitudes, and it has truly rocked my world. There hasn’t been anything that was blowing my mind, just simple truths that have been reiterated.

This week was on “A Joy State of Mind.” The first scripture reference was from 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18:

“Be joyful always: pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

I was at first taken back at this because it struck me as awkward. Have you ever been in a bad mood and someone tells you to just “buck up” or “be happy.” It never seems to help, or seem possible.

But, then I was reminded of a time when I was going to a study group on dating and marriage when I was in college. One of the things that the teacher said that has always stuck with me is… “behaving in love is more important than being in love.” He would talk about married couples who would not feel “in love” with their spouse anymore. They had “fallen out of love” with their spouse. He taught that if you act and behave in a matter of love, that the feelings would be there. Great stuff!

I translated that in my mind to this scripture. “Be joyful always” seems pretty unrealistic in this world. All of the mundane tasks of dealing with life, finances, and relationships. But, if I read this as “Behave joyfully always” it seems more attainable, more tangible.

We do have the ability to choose how we act, how we approach the mundane tasks and life. It is also interesting to know for all of the struggles in trying to figure out what God wants for us, what His will is… it is this… to behave joyfully… He even spells out how to do it… praying all the time… and being thankful…

No matter how stressed I can get about life, and right now in my life some financial concerns… I have the ability to pray, and even more importantly… have so many things for which to be thankful.

I got a ton out of this weeks message and so I will hopefully have the time and discipline to write and share more this week.

So, here is my challenge for my week…

Behave joyfully!

Tags: Joy, Joyful, Pray, Thanks, Attitude, God, Church, Stress, Life, Behave

I have had a few conversations over the last few days about church with different people in different circumstances. I have been around and involved in many different styles of churches. I have been on staff. I have been in leadership. I have studied it, and just generally been around it.

I was talking with someone the other night about what you get out of church. The effort it requires to be truly involved.

I read a devotional that seemed very timely with my discussions. It talked about the church trying to be less of an organization, and more of a society. And it really impressed upon me, one of the core questions isn’t, “What is my church doing for me?” but rather “what am I doing for my church?”

Now let me state this is not intended to be a pseudo-guilt-trip. I will not be passing the plate around in the next five minutes. It is really encouragement to better understand what church really is. It is not a place we should be seeking out to make ourselves feel better. It is not a spiritual hospital. It is meant to be its own community.

In the same way that JFK so eloquently put it, “Ask not what your country can do for you, but, rather what you can do for you country.” Substitute the word “community” or “church” and there you have it.

I think we would gain a lot in our communities if we all looked at what we have to bring and give, as opposed to “do I like the music?” or “does the pastor feed my needs?” (all valid, but to me it is a matter of perspective)

Tags: God, Church, Community, JFK, Society, Giving

I have been stuck on thinking about habits and addictions. I have more than a few friends who have worked in rehab centers. I have had a few who have gone through them. I wanted to share a story that I was reminded of the other day.

I was working at a church in a leadership position. I had really been struggling with some addiction issues. I knew that I could no longer “live a lie” and I had to tell the pastor of the church. From my history and church experience, I went into this church meeting completely ready to be asked to step down from my position.

Instead, my pastor looked at me and said, you know we all struggle with addictions. We are all addicted to something. I was blown away by this response, not at all what I was expecting. There was no judgment and no condemnation. There was also no endorsement to continue on in this destructive behavior.

I have started to read a book that is full of stories from people who have been restored from their addictions. It is amazing to see the hand of God at work in others lives.

I would encourage you to read through Romans 6

It talks a lot about being a slave to sin, or better yet, not being a slave to sin. I think this is a word picture that is overlooked and misunderstood for our time, because we really don’t understand what a “slave” truly is. But, if we did understand all that was involved in being a slave, we would understand how perfect this description is.

How encouraging is verse 11:

In the same way, you must think of yourselves as dead to the power of sin.

Let us not believe the author of lies… whatever your addiction is… it does no have the power over you.

Tags: Power, Sin, Addictions, Romans, Slave, Church, Christian, Love, Power, God

Okay, I realize that this is not the “ultimate” challenge in my life. If you knew me, you would realize that I am about to undertake something that is a pretty great challenge for me.

Yesterday at church our pastor gave a great message in this series he is doing on attitudes. I love that our pastor is willing to call us to action. It is something new for our body.

The two main points to the message: 1. You are what you think, 2. You think what you expose yourself to. So then he goes and makes a challenge to the congregation. As soon as he starts in, I know what is coming, and I get that sinking feeling in my stomach, like when you realized you didn’t finish your homework.

He says it… “I challenge you to go for 7 days without Television.” booooiiiinnnngggg A dagger through to my heart. I know all of the perils of TV. I know that what he is saying is a good thing. I know that TV is not inherently evil, but I also know that most of its content isn’t “glorifying.”

I work from home. I usually keep the TV on. It is like a timer. When Regis and Kelly go off… it’s 10am. After Ellen, it is time to start thinking about lunch. And at the end of the day, it is my escape from reality, well, into reality TV.

And of course the challenge comes during the first week of the new Big Brother 8.

As soon as he issued it, I knew that the little stirring inside of me meant that I HAD TO DO IT. So, here I go… I am into day 1 of no TV.

I am anxious to see how God works through these next seven days. I thank God for my pastor and his challenge.

I will appreciate your prayers as I restrain myself from TV.

(Maybe I could make a reality TV show about people who don’t watch reality TV… wait, I need to workshop this idea… haha)

Tags: Church, Challenge, TV, Television, Sacrifice, Ellen, Regis and Kelly, Big Brother 8, Pastor, Restraint

I went out to my church this Tuesday night for a celebration of the Fourth of July, with fireworks and all. I am blessed to go to an amazing church with the best music program. It was just a fun time. It was just a celebration. There was mostly music, and the Pastor did get up and tell a quick story.

And then our Pastor asked veterans from the different wars to stand and be recognized. In the aisle I was sitting in was a man who stood for the Vietnam war. He was a big guy. He was a tough guy. From appearances, he looked like he had a rough life; probably played football, rode a Harley, shot guns, had tattoos, every other stereotype you can fill in here in your mind.

When this man stood, I could see that he was fighting back emotions. He was crying a little bit. His wife stood up as people started to stand in ovation and put her arm around him. He gave her the “I’m okay” nod.

It impressed on me. There is something very special when big men cry. I am not sure what it is. It might be the common denominator, that emotion cuts through us all. Maybe it has something to do with putting us all on the same playing field.

I am not a big guy. (I am not a little guy either) But, I never was into sports and I was not someone who lived a really rough life. Shooting guns was something that I did at Summer camp. I ride a 49cc Scooter not a Harley. But, there is something comforting to know that the emotional plea that tugs at my heart strings, also tugs at that big guys heart strings.

I have to pay homage to my father. Not only is my father a veteran. He is the man who let me know it was okay to cry. I will never forget the first time I saw my father cry. It was at a spiritual retreat. I am not sure why he was crying, but I know when I saw him, I stopped trying to hold back the tears and let the floodgates open. This might seem awkward, but that was an amazing gift that he gave me; permission to experience my emotions.

Tags: Crying, Weeping, Big guys, Veterans, Father, Emotions, 4th of July, Church